I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
