Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
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