I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
