What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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