we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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