Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
