I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
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