Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
So much Jack, so little girl.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I enjoy the company of your penis
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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