You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
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She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
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It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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