Cold hands, warm shart.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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