they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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