Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
