I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
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There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
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I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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