So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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