There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
