Soap is not a condiment
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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