my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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