tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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