Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
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