I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you would pick up someone in the library
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
