that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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