I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
