i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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