u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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