WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize
