just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
