OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
