Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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