i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
