Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
