My nipple is on Facebook.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
That was an excessively violent trivia night
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
