either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
