I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
