on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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