Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
