Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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