New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
