State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
This is my gift to your gina
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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