You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I think I died a long time ago.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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