everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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