i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
