So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize