There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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