just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Randomize
