I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
