i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize