If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
