btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
