It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize