His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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